Ferdarian Versus Nature

Ferdarian versus Nature

August 25th 1849-the Meadowlane, Ferdern

“Now are you sure you want to do this?” Mira asked Henry as they walked up the driveway towards the Phillips’ mansion, known as the Meadowlane, “I’m sure Robert can handle the boys on his own and you have nothing to prove.”
The Meadowlane was situated on a green grassy hill. From its position on the hill, the mansion had a fantastic view of the surrounding terrain and of the small mountain ridge that was miles away. It was surrounded by trees, but they grew thinner with each passing day and were being replaced with small towns and cities, like the Ferdarian capital to the east and the growing city called Appleburg to the west. The mansion’s old support beams and walls bore the marks of the Ferdarian history that made it a minor landmark. The mansion was encircled by a recently hand built oak fence-a vain attempt to keep the reporters and politicians away and the yard was a mini-jungle. There was a patio on the left side of the house and the grapes grew on handmade trellises which were on the right side of the house. The fruit on the hand planted fruit trees were beginning to ripen and the bushes and flowers were thriving and had to be beaten back with a stick before they took over the whole yard. The sky was a clear blue and the early morning mist was starting to disappear. There had been a morning rain, but most of the plants were dry now and it promise to be a warm, but not too warm.
“You’re asking me to let Robert take Mercury out into the woods by himself,” said Henry, staring at his wife skeptically.
Henry was wearing a thick button down shirt and tweed jacket as well as a tweed cap. He had a small pack on his back and he was holding a walking stick. His sons stood behind him and were similar dressed, except Mercury had somehow already lost his jacket and Eric insisted on wearing the sailor’s cap Strata had bought him last Christmas and only James was using a walking stick.
“You have a point,” said Mira.
“Hey!” said Mercury, folding his arms in front of his chest.
“But…are you sure this is a good idea? You’re not the most patient man,” she said, biting her bottom lip nervously.
“They’re right,” Hermes told Mercury.
“It will be fine,” said Henry, rolling his eyes and knocking on the door.
“Just be nice,” she said, “Don’t be….you.”
Henry glared at her.
“And, boys, be on your best behave, especially you,” said Mira, grabbing Mercury’s ear.
“Ah, ah, ah. I haven’t done anything yet!”
“Where’s your jacket?”
Mercury muttered under his breath as the door opened and a disheveled Jessica appeared.
“Oh, sorry to keep you waiting. Come in, come in. Robert is just planning the route.”
Jessica stepped out of the way and they walked through the foyer and into the living room. Alex and Michael were sitting on the couch, waiting for their father, but they jumped up when they saw the Banks boys.
“The route?” asked Mira, raising her eyebrows as she looked at her husband, “You actually let him plan out the trip?”
“I can cede control,” said Henry, staring at her incredulously.
Both Mira and Jessica stared at him as the boys tried to stifle their laughter.
“He didn’t really give me a chance to protest,” Henry muttered.
“Listen to me,” whispered Jessica, “Take that map away from him as soon as you can. He is horrible with directions.”
“Oh, I’m sure it will be fine,” said Mira, giving Henry a dark look, “Besides it will be nice for Henry to let someone lead the way for once.”
“I’m not sure about that,” muttered Jessica.
“Ten bucks Father only let Uncle Rob lead for the first five minutes,” Mercury muttered Eric.
“You’re being generous,” said Eric, “I give it three.”
“No way,” said Michael, “Your Dad is already vibrating. I give it until we leave the property.” “Be nice,” reproached James as Alex and Hermes rolled their eyes.
“All right,” said Robert, emerging from the dining room, “I think I have everything planned out. As soon as Henry and the boys arrive-Oh, hi, Hank. Ready for our adventure?”
“As ready as I’ll ever be.”
“Where are you taking them, darling?” asked Jessica.
“A new path I’ve been dying to try. It’s about ten miles up the road and it should be an easy hike,” said Robert, folding the map up and putting it in his pocket.
Michael and Alex exchanged knowing glances.
“Where does it lead to?” asked Mira.
“Lake Carmen.”
“Oh, we should have brought fishing poles,” said Mercury.
“So you can embed a fishhook in one of our foreheads,” laughed Michael.
“Now, now, boys, be nice,” said Robert, fixing his cap, “We’ll be back in time for dinner, honey.”
“If you say so, dear,” said Jessica, kissing his cheek, “GIRLS! COME DOWN AND SAY GOODBYE.”
Sara hopped down the stairs as Samantha, with her arms crossed across her chest, slumped down the stairs.
“Have fun!” chirped Sara, hugging each of the boys, “And don’t get lost!”
“We’ll try not to,” said Hermes.
“Sara, Dad’s leading the way,” said Alex, hugging Sara.
Sara’s eyes grew to the size of saucers.
“Why? Is General Banks sick?”
“No, he’s trying to prove he can cede control,” said Hermes, returning Sara’s hug.
“What?” she asked.
“He and Mom got into a fight,” said Eric, rolling his eyes, “And now he’s trying to prove he doesn’t have to be in control all of the time.”
“Like anyone believes that,” snorted Samantha.
“At least he’s trying,” said Hermes as Robert kissed Sara goodbye.
“Yeah, and it might be a good exercise for him,” said Alex.
“Or he’s going to murder Dad,” said Michael.
“Come on, now, we have to get going before we lose any sunlight,” said Henry and then he caught Mira’s eyes, “that is, if you agree, Robert.”
“Yes, you’re right, Henry,” said Robert, kissing Samantha on the cheek.
“Can’t I come with you?” pleaded Samantha, grabbing his arm, “I’m really good at hiking.”
“No,” said Robert, escaping her grasp and tussling her hair, “This is a boy’s outing. Stay here and enjoy your girl’s day.”
Samantha glared at him as he led the way out of his house.
“All right, boys, let’s go on an adventure!”
“He’s going to need this,” said Jessica, handing Robert’s pack to Alex.
“Thanks, Mom. Bye!”
Jessica sighed as they filed out of the door and climbed into two carriages. She closed the door, wondering if she would ever see her family again, before turning to face the girls.
“I thought they would never leave,” said Mira, “Now let’s make something to drink and have some fun,”
She rested her hands on the girl’s shoulders and led them into the kitchen.
“I’m hoping you mean lemonade, Mira,” said Jessica, following her girls.
“Of course,” said Mira, “I know I’m a corrupting influence, but I’m not that bad.”
“Maybe we can make cookies!” said Sara.
“That is your solution to everything,” said Samantha.
“Now, now, girls, don’t fight,” said Jessica.
“Yes, I get enough of that with the boys,” said Mira, cutting open two lemons, “Sam, come here and helped me squeeze the lemons.”
“We should do something fun,” said Jessica, “Something we can’t do when the boys are around.”
“I’m not sure they’re at the appropriate age yet,” said Mira.
Jessica stared at her incredulously.
“I am sorry. I’m so used to being other Henry’s soldiers,” said Mira, shaking her head, “I’ve almost forgotten what it is like to be around respectable company.”
“It’s fine,” said Jessica, taking out the sugar, “Robert was the same way the first year he returned from the Ignis.”
“Well, what can’t we do when the boys aren’t around?” asked Samantha, squeezing a lemon.
They stood there and thought.
“Oh! I know!” said Sara, “We can get all dressed up and look pretty.”
“That’s lame,” said Samantha as Jessica took out a pitcher of water.
“Actually I would love to do that,” said Mira, “I never get to dress up my children, although I got Mercury to wear a dress once.”
“What?!” laughed the Phillips women.
“Oh, yes, and he was not happy,” said Mira as Jessica poured water into the pitcher of lemon juice.
“Why did you put him in a dress?” asked Sara.
“How did you get him in a dress?” asked Samantha.
“Oh, you can get him to do anything if you threaten him with a plateball bat.”
“Mira!” said Jessica.
“I know it sounds harsh, but you don’t have to live with him,” said Mira, pouring sugar into the pitcher.
“Besides you threw a frying pan at Michael’s head once.
“That is completely different.”
“Why?”
“Because it was Michael’s head, it was your father’s,” said Jessica, blushing.
“Mom!” said her two daughters.
“Oh, you don’t want to know what I’ve thrown at Henry’s head,” said Mira, stirring the lemonade, “You know he took my bullets away.”
The young girls furrowed their eyebrows as Jessica said, “Is this age appropriate?”
“Yes,” said Mira, rolling her eyes, “For last Christmas, Henry bought a pair of matching pistols with the family crest-a crest he designed himself-engraved on the handle. One pistol was for himself and the other was for me. And yesterday he took the bullets away.”
“I’m curious as to why he gave you bullets in the first place,” Jessica smiled as she handed Mira a glass.
Mira gave her a friendly, knowing glare as she poured the lemonade.
“And for that, you can taste test this.”
Jessica took the glass and took a sip.
Her lip quivered and she gagged, “Needs more sugar.”
“Was he cute in a dress?” asked Sara.
“Who?” asked Mira, grabbing the sugar.
“Mercury.”
“Oh, yes, he was adorable.”
“Why was he in a dress in the first place?” asked Jessica, tilting the package of sugar in Mira’s hand so more sugar poured into the pitcher, “Is that how you punish the boys for driving you crazy, because if it works I might start doing it.”
“No,” laughed Mira, “Well…it’s not my normal type of punishment. He was just driving me crazy that day and I needed a model, so he was voluntold.”
“Why did you need a model?” asked Samantha.
“Oh, I was painting a picture.”
“You like to paint?!” said Sara, his eyes widening.
“Yes, why? Do you like to paint?”
“Well…I want to learn.”
“I’ll teach you,” smiled Mira, “Here, try it now.”
Jessica poured herself another glass and nodded her head.
“Mmm, much better.”
“Great. Now let’s pour four glasses and go upstairs and see what clothes you have to play with,” said Mira.
“I have a lot, but Sam hid most of her dresses,” said Sara as Jessica grabbed three glasses.
“Why did you do that, Sam?” asked Mira, taking a glass from Jessica.
“I don’t know.”
“But I know where they are,” said Sara.
“No, you don’t!”
“Yes, I do!”
“Shut up!’
“Girls,” said Jessica, “Behave yourselves. We have a guest.”
“It’s all right,” said Mira, “I remember what it was like having a sister.”
“You had a sister?” said Sara.
“Yes, an older sister and she drove me insane,” said Mira, leading them upstairs, “Always bossing me around. Always getting me into trouble.”
“Yeah, Sam does that all the time.”
“I do not!” said Samantha as she and her mother followed the pair up the stairs, “Besides she always takes my things!”
“You don’t have anything I want.”
“Girls,” sighed Jessica.
“I’ve got this,” said Mira, looking over her shoulder and winking.
“I feel your pain. The both of you,” said Mira as they walked down the hallway towards the girl’s room, “I used to steal my sister’s things, she used to steal my things, I used to get her in trouble, she used to get me in trouble, and both of our parents wanted to kill us.”
“Sounds about right,” muttered Jessica.
Mira opened the door to the room and let the others file in before following them. She sat down on Sara’s bed and pulled the girls to her.
“We grew up hating each other, and then I married Henry and no one from my family talked to me until mom died and I went to funeral. That was the first time I had seen my sister since I was married and it was the first time I met my niece. It was at that moment I realized how much I had lost just because of stupid jealousies and things that didn’t really matter. Now, we’re desperately trying to make up for lost time, but I can’t stop thinking about all the good moments we missed. You don’t want that to happen to you, do you?”
Sara and Samantha looked at each other and shook their heads.
“No.”
“Well you have to stop fighting now; otherwise, you’re going to lose each other. Ok?”
“Ok.”
Mira smiled as she shared a glance with Jessica.
“Now go pick out your favorite dresses, even you Sam. Once you put on your dresses, your mother and I will fix up your hair and maybe your mother will let you wear her jewelry. I didn’t even think to bring mine.”
Sara ran to her closet and Samantha ran to under her bed and looked through their dresses.
“Thank you,” Jessica told Mira.
“It will last maybe a day, but at least you’ll have some peace and quiet.”
“Here, Mom, can you help me?” said Sara, handing her a pink dress covered in ribbons.
“Sure, honey.”
“Do you need help, Sam?” asked Mira, rising.
“No, I’m fine,” said Samantha, struggling with her dress.
“Are you sure?” asked Mira, suppressing a smirk
“Yeah,” said Samantha, stuck in the dress.
Mira stood next to her and watched her struggle, violently flinging her empty sleeves around, and her skirt rode up her body. She paused and turned around in a circle, apparently trying to sense were Mira was standing.
“Ok, I need help.”
Mira smiled, bent down, and helped Samantha with her dress. When they were done, her hair was disheveled, but her green and blue dress looked very nice.
“Ah, you’re so pretty, Sam,” said Mira, brushing her hair out of her face, “You shouldn’t hide it.”
“Let’s go downstairs,” said Jessica, holding two brushes and a number of clips, “And you two can sit at the kitchen table while Mira and I brush your hair.”
“I wonder if the boys are having as much fun,” chirped Sara.

“Daaaaaaad, my feet are killing me,” moaned Michael, bring up the rear.
“Mike, we just started,” said Robert, holding the map in front of his face.
“Hang on,” said Mercury, “I think there is a rock in my shoe.”
They paused and Henry tightened his grip on his walking stick. They had spent a good hour in the wagons as Robert tried to figure out where the path started and five minutes later Mercury had a rock in his shoe, Michael’s feet were killing him, Robert had his nose glued to the map, and James seemed to be in some kind of distress, but he wouldn’t say what it was. He mentally cursed Mira for this and swore that he was going to lock her out of the house-if-they ever made it home. Mercury took off his right shoe and turned it over and nothing came out. He furrowed his eyebrows and he took off his left shoe and turned it over. Nothing.
“What the?”
“Come on, Mercury,” said Henry as Robert absentmindedly walked forward.
Mercury hopped behind his friends struggling to put on his shoes. The forest was thick and vibrant green. The sunlight filtered through the thick branches, leaves, and pines, but Henry also noticed that dark clouds were forming. Hm, that might be trouble later on. The road was mostly smooth except for the occasional rock or tree root, but it was uneven and Henry had the distinct feeling that it was slowly rising, which made no sense because Robert said the ground was supposed to be flat. The air was still and occasional broken by the bird’s chirping-or the boy’s complaints.
“I swear there is a rock in my shoe,” said Mercury.
“You just checked,” said Hermes.
“I know! I think it’s hiding.”
“Where would a rock hide in your shoe?” asked Alex.
“I don’t know. In the big toe somewhere,” said Mercury, hopping on one leg as he tried to feel the toe of his shoe.
“Mercury, stop goofing around,” said Hermes, “Father is close to snapping as it is, don’t make things worse.”
“Are we still going the right way?” Henry politely asked Robert.
“Oh, yes, most definitely,” said Robert, staring at the map, “I think…”
Henry took a deep breath before saying, “If you need help, just let me know.”
Robert looked away from the map and grinned.
“Relax, Hank, I’ve got it covered.”
Henry nodded his head with a tight grin.
“Hey, Eric?” James whispered, running to keep up with him.
“Yeah?”
“How’s it going?’
Eric glared at him.
“How do you think it’s going?”
James fidgeted and tried to walk while crossing his legs. Eric raised an eyebrow.
“James, what the hell are you doing?”
“I really have to pee.”
“Of course you do,” said Eric rolling his eyes.
“But I don’t want to tell Dad and Uncle Rob because…well Dad looks like he wants to kill someone and Uncle Rob seems really intent on finding this lake.”
“I’ll go talk to Hermes.”
“Can’t you just take me?”
“I still need to let the others know, so they can stop and wait for us.”
James bit his lip before nodding his head. Eric strode forward and grabbed Hermes’ arm.
“Eric, what is it?”
“We have an issue.”
“Now the map says turn right, but that doesn’t seem right,” muttered Robert.
“What is it?” asked Hermes.
“Are you sure this is where the turn is supposed to be?” asked Henry, resisting the urge to take the map away from Robert.
“James has to pee.”
Hermes looked up at the sky to a God he didn’t believe in before looking at Eric, “I told him to go when we were in the house.”
“Yeah, well, I don’t know how much longer he can hold it.”
Hermes sighed.
“I can take him. In fact, I think he would prefer if I took him.”
“Let me talk to Uncle Rob and Father.”
“Argh this rock!”
Alex raised an eyebrow and watched Mercury hop on one foot as he tried to take off his shoe.
“Mercury, you’ve checked your boots ten times. There’s no rock in there.”
“There has to be!”
“All right, boys, we’ll take a break here,” said Robert as they halted, “If you need to relieve yourselves follow Hermes.”
James grabbed Eric’s arm and said, “Could you please come?”
“Why?” asked Eric, his eyes widening.
“I feel like you’d be able to handle a bear better than Hermes.”
Eric stared at his younger brother before rolling his eyes.
“Fine, I’ll come too.”
“Thank you,” smiled James as they followed Hermes in the forest.
“Don’t go too far,” said Henry as Robert muttered to himself.
“Now if we go right…No, that’s wrong. Left?”
Mercury sat down on a log and violently shook his shoe.
“Come on, you stupid rock! Where are you?”
“I’m telling you there is no rock in there,” said Alex.
“What else could he be?” asked Mercury, looking into his shoe and making a face at the smell.
“I don’t know. Maybe it’s in your sock?”
“Why would there be a rock in my sock?”
“Why would there be a rock in your shoe after you checked it ten times?” asked Alex.
“Because it’s hiding on me.”
“Yeah, I’m sure that’s what it is,” said Alex, rolling his eyes.
“See this doesn’t make sense,” Robert muttered to himself, looking over the forest.
The path had grown unpredictably steep and one could easily trip and roll down the hills on each either side of the path, which wasn’t right at all. This land was supposed to be mostly flat and actually downward sloping. Maybe Jessica had been right. Maybe this had been a bad idea. Henry stood next to him, his grip on his walking stick so tight he was sure it would snap.
“Need help?”
Robert looked at him and sighed.
“Yes, but don’t tell Jessica. She’ll never let me hear the end of it.”
“I won’t tell Jessica, if you won’t tell Mira that I took over.”
“Deal,” said Robert, extending his hand.
Henry shook it before taking a corner of the map from Robert and they looked at it together.
“See we’re supposed to be here, but that doesn’t make sense because according to the map the path should turn left, but, obviously, it doesn’t.”
“See, I think we’re here, near the Goshen Waterfall,” said Henry.
“That’s fifteen miles from where we’re supposed to be,” said Robert.
“I know, but do you notice how the land has been rising? It wouldn’t be doing that if we were approaching the lake.”
“Hm, I don’t know.”
“Do you have a compass?”
Robert checked his pockets and frowned.
“I must have left it back home. Alex, might have one. Alex!”
“Yes, Dad?”
“Do you have a compass we can borrow?”
“Yeah,” said Alex, taking it out of his pocket and handing it to his father.
“Good, so according to this thing, we are facing SE.”
“We’ll if we want to walk to the waterfall, we’re going to need to turn left, unless you’re determined to get to the lake.”
“I don’t care where we actually end up, we just need to agree to tell Jessica that we went to the lake,” said Robert.
Henry thought about it for a second before shrugging.
“Works for me.”
“All right, boys, let’s getting going,” said Robert, putting the map back in his pocket.
Mercury muttered under his breath as he searched for the rock in his shoe.
“Just give me a second.”
“Wait, where are the others?” asked Henry, turning to look around.
“Surely, they should have returned by now,” said Robert.
“Maybe they’re lost,” said Alex.
Henry sighed.
“Come on, let’s go find them.”
Mercury, in the process of putting his shoe on, moved the log, causing it to roll down the slope, taking Mercury with him. The forest echoed with his cries as his father and his friends chased after him.
“Hang on, Mercury!” said Robert, map billowing behind him, “We’re coming.”
The map was caught on a branch and ripped, but no one noticed as they chased after the rolling Mercury. There was a loud splash and an ow as they skidded to a halt on the shore of a small stream-which Mercury had fallen into, on top of the log.
“Are you all right?” asked Robert as he and Henry rushed to Mercury’s aid..
Mercury groaned in response. Henry pulled his son up and helped him walk to a boulder. The red head sat down and hissed as Henry undid his shirt.
“Mercury, can you hear us?” asked Robert as Mercury swayed on the boulder.
The boy’s half open eyes focused on Robert and he furrowed his eyebrows before groaning.
“Uncle Rob.”
“Yes?” asked Robert, kneeling next to Henry as he checked his son’s ribs.
“The next time we go hiking, please let Father plan the route.”
“I don’t think Mom is ever going to let us go hiking after this,” said Alex as Robert and Henry exchanged amused glances.
“It looks like you have a few bruised ribs, but nothing serious,” said Henry, rising.
“You were lucky,” said Robert, tussling Mercury’s hair.
“Is that what you call it?”
“What now?” asked Alex.
“Now we have to try and find the others,” sighed Henry.
“And then find a way out of here,” said Robert, helping Mercury up, “And we’ll just pretend we found the lake.”
“And I fell into it and that’s why I look the way I do,” said Mercury.
“And why you’re missing your shoe,” said Henry shaking his head.
“Oh, damn.”
“Well…at least you don’t have a rock in your shoe anymore,” said Alex.
“Except I think it jumped into the other shoe,” said Mercury, looking down at his remaining shoe.
Before anyone could respond there was a loud crack and rain poured onto their heads.
“That’s it! I’m never going hiking again!” said Mercury.

Hermes, James, and Eric walked through the woods, Michael trailing behind them. Hermes and Eric had found five different spots James could use, but they were not good enough for their younger brother.
“James, just pick a spot and go!” said Eric.
James gave a squeak and walked towards a large tree. He looked it up and down and timidly nodded his head. They stood there expectantly and his eyes widened.
“You’re not going to watch, are you?”
Eric growled as Hermes prayed for peace and they turned around finding themselves face to face with Michael.
“Oh, Mike, I didn’t realize you had to go too,” said Hermes.
“What?”
“Don’t you have to pee?” asked Eric.
“What?! No, I thought you guys were going back to the carriages and so I thought I would tag along.”
“Oh, no, to tell you the truth, Uncle Rob got me so turned around I don’t even know where the carriages are,” said Hermes.
“Oh yeah, that’s comforting,” said Eric.
“Guys, do you have a napkin of some sort?” asked James.
Hermes and Eric shared glances.
“Use a leaf,” said Michael.
“And get poison ivy on…down there?!”
“Don’t use a leaf from a poison ivy plant then,” said Michael as if it was obvious.
“James, we don’t have anything,” said Hermes.
James squeaked.
“What am I supposed to do?”
“Just shake it, James, it’ll be fine,” said Eric.
James let out another squeak as Hermes sighed and Michael stifled a laugh.
“James,” Eric called over his shoulder, “Figure out what you’re going to do and do it because we’re leaving in five minutes and we will leave without you if we have to.”
“I’m glad you’re not my brother,” said Michael as James whimpered.
Their youngest walked up to them and said, “I’ve never felt so dirty in my life.”
“You’ll get over it,” said Eric, “Now can we go? I’m afraid father may be trying to strangle Uncle Rob.”
“No, they’ll be fine,” said Hermes, “We left Alex with them.”
“And Mercury,” said Michael.
‘Dear God, let’s go,” said Hermes, walking the way they came.
“Wait, it’s not that way, it’s this way,” said Michael, walking in a different direction.
“Mike, I don’t think so,” said Hermes as James followed Michael.
“Trust me,” said Michael, disappearing into the woods.
“Trust him,” muttered Eric, “He’s the one Phillips kid who inherited their father’s lack of direction.”
Hermes smiled as they followed Michael and James through the woods.
“I say the next time Dad tries to prove a point to Mom, she needs to come on the adventure,” grunted Eric, pushing a branch out of his face.
“Then we’d lose both parents,” said Hermes.
“So? I’m sure the Phillips would take us in,” said Eric.
“We’d have to get rid of Mercury first.”
The two brothers laughed as they followed Michael and James through bushes and over logs.
“Ow! That was a spikey plant,” said James.
“Yeah, didn’t see that one there,” said Michael.
“Mike, I think you just led us into a patch of poison ivy,” said Eric.
“Whatever, I think the others are-HERE!” Michael said, jumping out into the open.
Eric showed a branch to Hermes and said, “I’m going to kill him.”
“Mom is going to kill Father for this,” said Hermes as they emerged from the forest.
“Michael, are you sure this was the right way?” asked James.
They should be right here!” said Michael, whirling around, “Right here!”
“Say it three more times, Mike, and they will magically appear,” said Eric.
“I told you it was the other way,” said Hermes.
“I could have sworn,” said Michael, scratching the back of his head.
“I guess we have to go back,” sighed James.
“Not through the poison ivy patch,” said Eric.
“It’s not poison ivy,” said Michael.
“Talk to me in a few hours,” said Eric.
“Well…unfortunately it might be better to go back that way,” said Hermes, “Because I don’t know where here is in relation to where we were.”
“Maybe we should just wait here until they find us,” said James.
“But there is no guarantee they will come this way,” said Eric, “Especially since we don’t know if this way is on their route.
“Doesn’t that tree look familiar?” said Michael, pointing at a gnarly tree.
Eric glared at him as Hermes hesitantly led his brothers and friend back the way they came, trying to avoid the plant that suspiciously looked like poison ivy. They found the pee tree without problem and Hermes said, “This time we’re going to this way.”
They followed Hermes and reached the spot where their family was supposed to be waiting for them.
“What the hell?!” Hermes snapped, before taking a deep breath and tried to remain calm.
“Oh, sure, follow me, Mike, you don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Shut up, you’re the idiot who led us through poison ivy,” snapped Eric.
“And I think it’s starting to kick in,” said James, scratching his neck.
“This never would have happened if he hadn’t needed to pee!” said Michael, pointing at James.
“Yeah, why didn’t you go into the house?” asked Eric.
“Because I didn’t need to pee back then.”
“Calm down,” said Hermes, “Everything is going to be fine.”
There was a loud crack and it started to pour.
“You were saying,” said Michael.

“You look so pretty, Sam,” said Mira, brushing her long blonde hair.
“I really wish you would let me brush it for you more often, Sam,” said Jessica, putting Sara’s hair into pigtails.
“Why? So you can make me look stupid?” said Samantha.
“I don’t look stupid.”
“No, dear, you look adorable,” said Jessica.
“Yes, I agree,” said Mira, smiling.
Sara beamed in her chair and Samantha let out an ow!
“Sorry, dear, but you have a horrible knot right here.”
“It’s because she runs through the woods and gets all kinds of twigs and leaves in her hair,” said Sara.
“No, I don’t.”
“Are you usually chasing after Mercury,” said Mira with a knowing smile.
“Well he has to stop taking my stuff animals,” said Samantha.
“He used to do the same thing to James, except James couldn’t really chase after him so Eric did it for him.”
“Those two are such trouble makers,” said Jessica.
“It’s mostly Mercury,” said Mira, pulling Samantha’s hair back, “I don’t know where we went wrong with that one.”
“I like him,” said Sara, “He’s funny.”
“That’s because you don’t have to live with him,” said Mira, putting the brush down and braiding Samantha’s hair.
“Surely he’s not that bad,” said Jessica.
“Oh, you have no idea,” said Mira, “He gets it all from his father of course.”
“General Banks?” said Samantha.
“He was a hellraiser when he was younger,” said Mira, “Why do you think I married him?”
“I wonder that every day,” grinned Jessica.
“You’re not the only one,” laughed Mira, “But he has his moments. Hold still, Sam, almost done.”
“You know I actually don’t know how you and Henry met,” said Jessica, looking Sara over.
“Oh, well the first time we met was at a party being held at GMA.”
“They have parties at GMA?” laughed Jessica
“General Banks went to a party?” said Samantha, her eyes widening at the thought.
“Yes, not willingly mind you, but he went with some friends and I went with some friends and well…I looked across the room and there was Henry, sitting at the bar talking to John Heth and I don’t know,” said Mira, smiling as she remembered that night, “I went up to him and we talked.”
“Did you dance?” asked Sara.
“No,” laughed Mira, “Henry and I have only danced once and that was at our wedding and I think he was a little drunk.”
“I cannot picture Henry drunk,” laughed Jessica, brushing Sara’s bangs out of her face.
“It is a rare and unforgettable sight,” said Mira, walking in front of Samantha, “But what about Robert? Has he ever gotten drunk?”
“A few times,” said Jessica, “Oh ,dear I don’t think the pigtails are even.”
“What was he like?” asked Mira, resting her hand on Samantha’s chin and looking her over.
“More absentminded and ridiculous than usual,” said Jessica, redoing Sara’s pigtail, “And a bit lascivious.”
She winked.
“Is that how you had four children?” asked Mira.
“I could say the same to you,” smiled Jessica, “All right, Sara, all done.”
The youngest Phillips grabbed the handheld mirror and grinned.
“Aw, I look adorable.”
“Here, Sam, what do you think?” asked Mira, handing Samantha another mirror.
The young girl’s eyes widened and she smiled despite herself.
“Thank you, Ms. Johnson.”
“Aunt Mira,” the Banks mother laughed.
“Really?”
“Yes, if my boys can call your parents aunt and uncle, then you can call me aunt. However, I wouldn’t call Hank uncle.”
“Oh never!” said Samantha, her eyes the size of saucers.
The two older women laughed.
“Hey, can we fix you guys up?” said Sara.
“Fix up?” asked Jessica, putting her hand on her hips.
“I mean…”
“Dress you up,” said Samantha, “Oh! Let’s go upstairs and get Mom’s make-up!”
“Yeah!”
Before the older women could say anything the two girls ran upstairs.
“They’re precious,” said Mira, sitting down.
“You don’t live with them,” said Jessica, shaking her head, “But I love them.”
“You and Robert are so lucky.”
“Well you’re lucky too. I know that Mercury is a handful, but even he can be precious at times,” said Jessica, sitting down as well.
“He can be. Last mother’s day, he made me muffins…well he tried to make me muffins. He ended up setting himself and the kitchen on fire, but the thought was sweet.”
“And James seems to be growing stronger.”
“Yes, thank God. I was worried about him.”
“And he’s so cute when he’s around Eric.”
Mira smiled.
“It’s precious, although it drives Eric insane.”
Mira sighed as she traced a burnt on the table.
“Alex is growing into a very strong young man,” said Mira.
“Yes, I am very proud of him. I’m proud of all of them.”
Mira smiled and nodded her head.
“How are you and Robert?”
Jessica raised her eyebrows before admitted, “We’ve had our ups and downs, but things have gotten better. You know how it is.”
“Yeah, lucky us.”
Jessica’s face softened as Mira tightened.
“Is everything ok with you and Henry.”
“No,” said Mira, looking down, “They haven’t been for a long time.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“No, it’s ok.”
“Mira,” said Jessica, reaching across the table and grabbing her hand, “It’s ok. You can tell me.”
Mira sighed and brushed a strand of hair out of her face.
“I know you and Robert have had your difficulties, but at the end of the day, he’s willing and able to talk to you. Sure, it may take a few weeks and a few shattered glasses, but in the end you two are able to talk and you know each other inside and out. There’s an intimacy and a connection there,” said Mira, staring at a spot on the wall, “You guys…you’re one…When Henry and I married, I knew I was marrying a career soldier and I knew what that meant. I have no problem with the long distances, the high chances of death, losing friends. I understand and accept that. I even accept that the boys want to follow in his footstep. I want them too. They are so proud of him and they should be. He is a good man.”
Jessica nodded her head.
“When we first married he made me a promise that, no matter what, I wouldn’t lose him.”
Jessica furrowed her eyebrows as Mira smiled gently.
“This was right before the Ignis War started, but I knew that something bad was going to happen and I knew he would be involved and I was worried. My father wasn’t in the military, but he was a Shivian police officer stationed in the Shivian Hills during the vicious times and I watched him and his friends cut themselves off from each other, one by one, and I was terrified of Henry doing the same thing, especially given his personality. It is so easy for him to get lost in whatever he’s doing and I wasn’t going to be married to that. I wasn’t going to be married to the uniform. I loved the man and I didn’t want to lose him to the bugle calls, the shined brass, and twirling rifles, so I made him promise me that I would never lose him. I would be the one part of him that wasn’t going to be swallowed up by all that crap.”
“That sounds reasonable.”
“And it was fine. We survived the Ignis Desert, in fact we actually grew closer because of that damn war, and I had Hermes and…I will never forget the look on his face the first time he held Hermes and I knew that everything was going to be ok.”
Jessica nodded her head again.
“But then the Black Forest War started and…something happened, Jess. I don’t know if you understand, but something happened and I lost him. I don’t know how and I don’t know how I could have stopped it, but within the span of six months he was gone. I tried to talk to him about it and he brushed me off. He told me that he had to cut himself off to win the war and at the time it made sense and I wanted to trust him. I mean, out of the two us, he knew more about war than I did and he said he would be able to turn back on when the war over. But he hasn’t and I don’t think he can.”
Jessica frowned.
“Robert goes through theses phases himself and it can be hard,” nodded Jessica, “It’s just…our husbands-despite being very different-are similar in one way, when they put their mind to something, there are very few things that can distract them and they easily get lost in their work. Now, I don’t know Hank as well as you do, but I’ve seen him warm up around you and the children. He’s not completely gone yet, not yet.”
Mira grinned.
“Thanks, Jess. I’m sorry. You don’t know to know about my problems. I’m sure you have plenty of your own.”
Before Jessica could answer, they heard two high pitched screams and the sound of Sara and Samantha tumbling down the stairs. The mothers jumped up and ran into the living room, where they collided with the two young girls.
“What’s wrong?” asked Jessica, holding Sara by the shoulders.
“We saw a…saw a….Oh my god!!!” squealed Sara.
“What did you see?” asked Mira.
“We saw a mouse!” said Samantha.
Jessica and Mira jumped back five feet as they whitened.
“A what?” asked Mira.
“That’s not possible!” said Jessica, “I keep this house spotless and clean.”
“I’m telling you we saw a mouse!” said Samantha as Sara mutely nodded her head.
Jessica shared a glance with Mira.
“Ok, let’s go check this out,” said Jessica.
“But first, we need to be armed,” said Mira, walking into the kitchen,” Don’t worry, I’ve dealt with plenty of mice in the barracks we used to live in.”
“Henry had rats?” said Jessica.
“Not after we moved in,” said Mira, “But before we moved in, those places were crawling with fuzzy creatures.”
They walked into the kitchen as Mira gathered weapons. She gave Jessica a frying pan, she gave Sara a sauce pan, she gave Samantha a meat pounder, and she took a broom.
“Onward!” said Mira, leading the way.
They marched upstairs and into the hallway.
“Where did you see the mice?” asked Mira.
“In Alex’s room,” said Sara, hiding behind Samantha.
Mira kicked the door open and peered around the corner. No mouse. They crept into the room and split up. Jessica checked under the bed, Mira checked under the table, Sara pretended to check one of the corners and Samantha kicked some of the items on the floor. Sara screamed and Mira whirled around and slammed the broom on the floor.
“Did I get it?” she asked.
“I don’t know,” trembled Sara.
“Look there!” screamed Samantha, slamming her meat pounder on the floor.
“Oh, wait! I think I see it!” said Jessica.
“No, there!” said Mira, slamming the floor again.
“Come on you son of a bitch!”

“I don’t remember this slope being this steep,” gasped Mercury as they climbed through the woods back to the original path.
“That’s because you were rolling down it,” said Alex, wiping the rain out of his eyes.
Robert ooafed as he slipped in the mud and Henry caught him.
“Thanks, Hank,” said Robert, “And, listen, I’m sorry this has been such a disaster.”
“It’s all right,” smiled Henry, “It reminds me of the first patrol I ever led.”
“Surely it wasn’t as bad as this.”
“Oh, God, it was worse. Theodore, I don’t know if you ever met him, but he’s a Major General now, he was my second in command and I made the mistake of giving him the map. We wound up in the middle of the enemy’s territory, Theodore had broken his leg falling off his horse, and another one of my soldiers was sick. We were nearly captured. It was a mess.”
Robert laughed and shook his head, “Something similar happened to me, except my unit was sent to try and rescue a unit that had been captured. Our captain was a complete moron. We never even saw the unit we were supposed to save and we nearly died of heat exhaustion ourselves.”
“Have to love the army,” muttered Henry.
“Speaking of the army, how are you doing?”
Henry looked at him with a raised eyebrow.
“I know this is the first time you haven’t had a command in the field and I was wondering how you were adjusting.”
“I do what I have to.”
“Hank,” said Robert, nearly slipping in the mud again, “I know you better than that.”
“Truthfully, I miss the field, but I think it might be better for Mira. I can return home daily now.”
“Except you don’t,” said Robert, giving him a knowing glance.
“I come home when I can,” said Henry, avoiding his gaze.
“Oh my God, why is this slope so steep?” wheezed Mercury.
“Why did you have to fall down it?” said Alex.
“It’s not like I wanted to,” said Mercury, “I was trying to get the rock out of my shoe!”
Mercury nearly ate it.
“Is the rock gone?”
“No, it’s in the other shoe and I think I lost my sock in the mud,” said Mercury looking at his mud coated foot.
“I knew I should have packed an extra pair of shoes,” said Alex.
“Yeah, well at least our fathers aren’t killing each other,” said Mercury, looking up at Henry and Robert.
“Yeah, it actually seems like they’re bonding.”
“The world might be ending.”
“Almost there, boys,” called Robert, “I can see the top.”
They looked up as they heard James’ voice.
“Hey, there you are!”
Michael and the others joined the side of the road.
“Where the hell were you guys?! We’re drenched to the bone.”
“Really?” said Mercury, “Because, as you can tell, we’re as dry as the Ignis!”
“Mercury rolled down the slope and we had to get him,” said Henry, “Just stay up there and we’ll be right-ah!”
Henry slipped and fell face first into the mud. Everyone stopped as Robert helped him help, suppressing a laugh.
“Are you all right?”
Henry glared at him.
“We’re never doing anything like this again.”
“I completely agree.”
Henry wiped mud off his face as they continued to climb up. They reached the top and Henry tried to clean himself off.
“Mom is going to kill you,” said James, “Do you know how many times she’s going to have to wash those clothes?”
“At least it’s proof that father wasn’t in charge,” said Eric.
Henry glared at his sons.
“Why are you covered in red splotches?” asked Robert, furrowing his eyebrows.
“It’s a long story,” sighed Hermes.
“Michael led us through a patch of poison ivy,” said Eric.
“Michael!” said Robert, “Jessica is going to kill me. She’s going to think either I lost you or I led you through a poison ivy patch.”
“I know how to solve this,” said Mercury, scraping mud off of Henry and throwing it at Hermes-hitting him in the face.
“Mercury!” said Henry, grabbing his wrist as Mercury winced because his ribs hurt.
“What the hell was that?!” said Hermes, wiping the mud off his face and looking ready to kill.
“See we can disguise the poison ivy with mud.”
“And what happens when we take a bath?” said Eric.
Mercury paused.
“Ok, maybe I should have thought that one out a little more.”
Henry let go of Mercury’s wrist and rubbed his muddy forehead.
“Let’s just go home. I’ll handle the wives.”
Robert stared at Henry nervously.
“I am happily married, Hank, and I would like to remain happily married.”
Henry glared at Robert.
“Do you want me to tell Mira you led the kids through a patch of poison  ivy?”
“All right, we’ll let Hank handle the women.”

Robert opened the door and peered into the house.
“Ok, they’re not in the living room. Come in, come in.”
The boys filed in the house, looking around for the women.
“This is creepy,” said Mercury, “Mom usually senses the moment I do something stupid.”
“Maybe we’re overloading her senses,” said Michael, “Or maybe they’re canceling each other out!”
They heard a scream from upstairs.
“Jessica?!” shouted Robert.
“Mira?!”
The two men ran up the stairs, Henry spraying mud everywhere, and Henry pulled Robert down as Mira swung a broom at their heads.
“What are you doing?!” Henry shouted.
“What are you doing here?!” said Mira.
“We finished the hike!” said Robert.
“We’re hunting mice!” said Sara, peering around Mira’s leg.
“Mice?” said the two husbands.
“We don’t have mice,” said Robert.
“Yes, we do,” said Jessica, peering over Mira’s shoulder, “We’ve killed two, but there are at least five more.”
“How did we get mice?” asked Robert as the boys joined them on stairway.
“Wait!” said Alex, grabbing his father’s arm, “Are you hunting Jerry and his family?”
“Jerry?” said Jessica.
“Yeah, Mercury and I found him and his wife in the field and we brought them inside,” said Alex.
“How did I know Mercury was somehow involved,” sighed Mira, leaning on the broomstick.
“Why did you bring them inside?!” screeched Jessica.
“They needed a home,” said Alex.
“Besides I couldn’t bring them home because Ben’s family would get jealous,” said Mercury, “You know squirrels are basically mice with fluffy tails.”
The parents glared at the children before looking at each other and said, “They get it from you.”
The family walked down the stairs and into the living room.
“So how was the hike?” asked Jessica.
Henry and Robert shared glances.
“It was interesting,” said Hermes.
“Henry, why are you covered in mud?” asked Mira, furrowing her eyebrows as he fully realized the state her family was in.
“And why are you covered in red splotches?” asked Jessica, pointing at the other boys.
“This is what happens when General Banks is not in control!” said Michael as Robert and Henry rolled their eyes.
The women placed their hands on their hips and stared at their husbands. Robert placed a hand on Henry’s shoulder and said, “If we throw the children in the way we might make it.”
“On the count of three,” replied Henry, eying the door.